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How To Stay Sane While Planning A Wedding

With less than four months until our wedding, I’ve been getting a lot of questions about how all the planning is going. There’s no denying I’m excited for the big day to arrive, but it’s definitely an exhausting process if I’m completely honest.

From guest lists to napkin colours, hens party planning and rehearsal dinners, there’s a lot to consider. I’ve been asked to review a handful of itineraries for my Canadian visitors and so wish I had more time to help because trip planning is my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE THING TO DO.

As a detail-oriented person, all the options can feel overwhelming. And lately, I’ve been finding just how important it is to take time out. Whether you’re planning a wedding, a big event or milestone of any kind, I encourage you to take time out to recharge as well. Not only will you appreciate the day so much more, it will help you avoid burnout. So, here are a few of my tried and true ways of saying sane during hectic times…

Release control
While it isn’t exactly characteristic of me to relinquish control, I’m coming to terms with just how vital it is. There are certain factors of your wedding day (or event) that are beyond your control — the weather, whether your guests will like the food and whether everything will go as planned (newsflash: it won’t!) In the end, it truly doesn’t matter, so move on. Further to this, there are planning elements you should leave to others (including your husband or wife to be…)

Hire a planner
I know I’ve covered this in previous blog posts, but working with a stylist and the planning team at Riccarton House has SAVED me. We’ve had regular meetings to discuss the finer details of the day and it’s really helped ease my fears (I’m definitely an anxious person). I’m also super indecisive, so this helps me bounce ideas off someone else. They know what they’re doing and can come to the rescue with the perfect recommendation to any problem I encounter. They also think of things that wouldn’t even cross my mind, so that’s a win in my books.

Take time out
Taking time out means different things to different people, but be sure you have days where you’re not thinking or talking about the upcoming event. Nick and I have started focusing on our five-year plan because we’ve been so preoccupied with the wedding over the past few months and has become a bit of a barrier. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an exciting time, but don’t allow it to distract you from living in the present and enjoying your relationship as it is now.

Book yourself in for a massage or facial
I’m the first to admit, I love a spa day. I’ve actually just booked my mom and sisters in for a pamper sesh a few days before my wedding. Massages and facials are wonderful investments in my opinion, you can’t put a price on looking after yourself and your mental health. And after being hunched over my desk all day, nothing feels better than having someone work out all the stress.

Exercise regularly
Exercise has always been important to me, but more so in the lead-up to our wedding. I’ve been careful not to focus too much on losing weight, after all I want to look like myself. But exercise is such a good way to combat stress and feel more focused and alert. I find I’m always more productive after a workout class.

Organise a menu tasting
We haven’t yet had our menu tasting, but I’ve been told it’s one of the most fun elements of wedding preparation. Our friends recently had theirs and they loved getting to sample everything and deciding what to serve. Riccarton House is home to the local farmers market, which is extra special to us. Being able to plan an event with a seasonal menu that supports local growers and producers sounds pretty incredible to me.

Spend less
As much as it’d be nice to have millions to spend on all the finer details, it’s more important to plan a fun day that your guests will enjoy. After all, your event should be about spending time with your guests. Personally, I’d much rather have an enjoyable, low-key gathering without draining my bank account.

Site visits
If you live close to your venue, visit often. Get a feel for the space and how you see the day unfolding. I’m lucky in that I can pop by Riccarton House for a coffee or an Aperol Spritz (they do the best spritzes) whenever I like. The grounds are frequented by cyclists, runners, locals and tourists, which makes for a lovely environment. I’m also a regular at the Christchurch Farmers Market, which gives me plenty of menu inspiration.

Well, there you have some of my tricks for staying sane while planning the biggest event of my life (so far). Are you planning a wedding and if so, what’s been your saving grace?

Photos by Malia Rose

November 28, 2018
The Best of Queenstown

You might remember my Queenstown guide from a couple years ago when Nick and I visited over Canterbury Anniversary weekend. We try to get away on long weekends whenever possible, but this year we were determined to save money (for obvious reasons). Initially, we thought we’d do a day trip somewhere nearby, but when the team at Southern PR invited us on a handful of exciting adventures, we couldn’t say no. Not only were we treated to some of Queenstown’s finest food and drink, we experienced first-hand the sustainability efforts Queenstown businesses are putting in play to make this popular destination as environmentally-friendly as possible. If you’re after a holiday that’s both action-packed and eco-friendly, read on for some ideas…

We kicked things off with a stay at mi-pad, a smart, sustainable hotel where your mobile phone acts as a digital concierge. All you have to do is download the app, mia to check in, access your room and quickly change the lighting and temperature. What I love about mi-pad is how effectively they utilize space – everything is consciously designed and carefully considered. Our room was perfectly compact; it had everything we needed and nothing we didn’t. Oh, and the view was spectacular. I’ve wanted to stay at mi-pad ever since it opened earlier this year. I like the growing trend of smaller hotels with shared spaces and the focus on only using what you need.

After a quick power nap (and some Netflix because you can Chromecast your phone to the TV, another neat feature!) I strolled into Moochi, which had conveniently opened that day. Afterwards, I ventured to Yonder for an intimate dinner with Southern PR and a lovely group of Queenstown content creators. I’d been to Yonder for breakfast last summer and loved the beautiful outdoor space and was impressed by the eclectic vegan and plant-based options. Yonder caters to all diets and everything is clearly marked, making it super easy to find dishes you’ll love. We sampled the new summer menu and it was ridiculously delicious! From fried cheese balls and fried chicken to fresh ceviche and lovely summer salads, everything was incredible. Their cocktail lineup is equally impressive. I loved the summer spritz, which is Yonder’s take on an Aperol spritz, but with rhubarb. Basically, I’ll be attempting to recreate it for the next few months. After dinner, we were treated to live music, which is a regular occurrence at Yonder Live.

The following day, Nick and I were up bright and early for a wine tour with Alpine Wine Tours. Queenstown’s surge in tourism means that more and more wine tours and companies have opened up this year. Alpine took us to a mix of boutique vineyards and well-known wineries. Central Otago is well known as one of the top three destinations for pinot noir alongside Burgundy, France and Oregon, USA. It’s also my preferred type of wine, so I was eager to try plenty of it on this tour. We stopped at Kinross for scrumptious platters and even sampled pinot noir chocolate (yum!) at Gibbston Valley. My personal favourite was Mt. Rosa, a boutique winery with amazing views and excellent wines. Both Nick and I loved the rosé and they also serve mulled wine and sangria, which is a refreshing change. I’ve been on plenty of wine tours, but I like the small size of our group and our tour guide, who was full of fun anecdotes and details about this beautiful wine region.

Just as we finished up at our last winery, the rain started to come down as we were due for dinner at Erik’s Fish and Chips, but that didn’t stop us. We met with the lovely owner, Anna who told us that Queenstown didn’t have a fish and chip shop three years ago when they opened. They’ve been hugely successful, especially on sunnier days, when customers can take their meals down to the beach. The menu is extensive and they do a tasty fish fry up, but probably most noteworthy is the deep fried kiwi fruit. It’s the perfect mix of sweet and sour and I can’t recommend it more. Another cool thing about Erik’s is that everything on the menu is gluten-free, but you’d never know. The team recently took home SME Business of the Year at the local business awards and have opened up shop in Wanaka. Definitely add this spot to your list when you’re next in QT.

Queenstown has experienced a population boom in recent years and traffic is becoming increasingly problematic with only one road in and out of the city. To help reduce congestion, Queenstown Ferries have refreshed their offering with Go Orange. Commuters and visitors can say goodbye to traffic jams, road rage and the hunt for an elusive car park. I really can’t think of a more scenic and sustainable way to get in and out of the town centre.

If you’re looking to get out and enjoy nature (of course you are, you’re in Queenstown), be sure to book yourself in for some ziplining adventures with Ziptrek. The Canadian company originally opened in Whistler before expanding to Queenstown. The views are unparalleled and the team is focused on educating visitors on local sustainability efforts. Each line begins with a quick lesson on how we can reduce our environmental impact. We did the Kea Tour, which includes six ziplines, finishing with a ride that descends 30 storeys at speeds of up to 70kph! It’s definitely a unique way to get down the mountain.

I was pleased to arrive in time for the opening of SLOW. A concept store on Beach Street, SLOW embraces and is named after the movement that encourages us to slow down our consumption habits. Rather than succumbing to fast fashion, SLOW is all about buying less but better. Exclusively stocking plenty of Scandinavian, American and Canadian brands, I was taken by the gorgeous homewares, well-made clothing and coffee table books in the light-filled shop. There’s also a FRAMA coffee machine with a cabinet of vegan and wholefoods. It’s definitely worth visiting when you’re next in Queenstown.

Some other businesses I’d suggest visiting:

Vudu Café and Larder: For a classic breakfast, I can’t go past Vudu. Grab a seat at one of the communal tables overlooking the lake and tuck into eggs and hash. And their coconut milk flat white is bliss!

Bespoke Kitchen With a focus on healthy breakfasts and plant-based treats, I make a point of stopping into Bespoke whenever I’m in Queenstown. The coffee’s excellent and the smoothie bowl is divine. Bespoke is right near the base of the gondola, so if you’re planning on a trip to the highest point in QT, stop here before or after for a bite.

Amisfield Winery Nick and I stopped here for lunch and a tasting a few years ago and I’ve been wanting to return ever since. They’ve released their 2018 rosé and I’m so eager to try it. Definitely book in advance as it can get busy!

Sherwood Queenstown I’ve stayed here previously and can’t recommend it enough. The Sherwood reminds me of the Canadian Rockies in the best way possible. It has a decidedly ski-lodge feel to it, with beautiful amenities, an incredible in-house restaurant and yoga studio. The outdoor eating area feels like a cosy campfire hangout. You honestly won’t want (or need) to ever leave.

Miss Lucy’s Located on the rooftop of Jucy Snooze, Miss Lucy’s is a beautifully designed space with epic views. Nick and I enjoyed watching the Queenstown Marathon finish line as we sipped on their new cocktail menu (their Aperol Spritz is killer) and delicious pizzas. The branding here is on point with impeccable attention to design detail, making it super ‘gram worthy.

Have you been to Queenstown before? If so, where are your must-visit spots?

November 19, 2018
Let’s Catch Up

It’s that time of year again. A golden glow is permanently cast over the city, weekends are quickly booking up, and Kiwi holidays are fast approaching. If you’re anything like me, you live for the summer months when the days are long and BBQs are plentiful. I always find myself reconnecting with long lost friends during the warmer months, finding extra time in my schedule for coffee dates and afterwork drinks.

One of my favourite parts of summer is the anticipation. The anticipation for more sunshine hours, holidays and weeks at the bach (Kiwi beach house). These feelings are amplified this year… I’m also anticipating 2019 to be a year of development and growth; one where I plan to invest in myself, my freelance business and my future. I plan to throw myself into my work, travel as much as possible (and in the least conventional way possible) and spend time with those who matter most.

A few weeks ago, upon returning to New Zealand, I experienced my regular post-travel blues. I always feel a bit out of sorts whenever I return from seeing my family in Canada. I think it’s the disconnect between my Canadian and New Zealand selves. It’s something anyone who lives far away from their immediate family can relate to. Lately, though I’ve found myself grateful for the privilege of being able to travel between the two countries and the exposure to two different cultures. It’s funny how I always say how similar Canada and New Zealand are because in many ways, they are vastly different.

So, how will I fill the next few months? Well, I’ve been experimenting with different exercise routines. From cycling and running to yoga (I just did a two-week trial at Apollo) and regular strength training and classes at Les Mills (my go-to for its proximity to my house), I’m also getting back into cooking and selling my wardrobe on Instagram (gotta save for the wedding somehow…) One of my goals is to shop less and streamline my wardrobe. One thing that’s helped immensely (and will continue to be a godsend come wedding season) is renting occasion wear and designer pieces. Lend the Label is my go-to and I love their business model and philosophy. Why buy new clothing when it’s more sustainable to borrow? I’ve just become an ambassador for them, which means I’ll be borrowing for all my major events this summer.

Professionally, I’m working on a new website — one that outlines my services (copywriting, SEO, content creation, guest blogging, sponsored content, etc.) because it’s clear I can’t keep directing prospective clients to this blog (as much as I love to!) I’m also looking into workshops, conferences and networking opportunities. Oh, and I think I’ve finally nailed that all-important pitch email, so more on that later… I went through a period of event exhaustion (all the bloggers in the house know what I’m talking about…) Going to events constantly can become draining, but during the summer months, I’m way more inclined to accept invites to media dinners and events. I find they are a great way to socialise and connect with people whom I have an online relationship but rarely see in person.

I’m also spending more time with myself, reflecting, reading and meditating. I’m truly cherishing working alone, having space to create, to write at my own pace, and to live more intentionally. As I get older, the more I want to commit to truly understanding myself and my behaviours.

What are your plans for the next few months? Whether you’re heading into the depths of winter or the sun-drenched days of summer, I hope you are well.

Photos by Malia Rose
Dress courtesy of Lend the Label (of course!)

November 11, 2018
A Feminist’s Guide To Getting Married

Criticism of marriage stems from a time when it meant ownership, submission and even darker imbalances between the sexes. As we all know, the definition of marriage continues to change. It’s up to our generation to figure it all out and rewrite the narrative.

I was quite ambivalent about marriage growing up. I didn’t date until after high school and was completely focused on my ambitions throughout university. One of my first jobs was at a wedding magazine in Toronto where I even wrote an article about how to put your spin on wedding traditions.

After getting engaged, I regularly thought about how I could simultaneously be both a wife and maintain my independence. In some ways, I feel a responsibility to contribute to a new way of being married — one where both partners are fulfilled personally and professionally. I’ve read articles that talk about this new template and how we’re not there yet.

…But I’m getting ahead of myself. The first step is rethinking how we incorporate modern values into our engagement and wedding day. If you’re feeling somewhat at odds with this whole marriage concept, here are some easy ways to reconcile your feminist ideals with wedding planning:

Footing the bill
Traditionally it was the bride’s family who paid for the entire wedding to show their appreciation to the groom for taking his daughter off their hands. While it’s rare for the bride’s family to pay for a modern wedding in its entirety, on average, they still contribute the largest amount. If it’s feasible, finance the wedding yourselves. If your parents are helping out, only accept equal contributions from both sides.

Share the planning load
When one partner takes on the bulk of the wedding planning, it creates a disparity (and often discord) in the overall outcome of your wedding day. We’re working with a few of our vendors, which means I’m usually organising and attending most of the meetings on my own. It’s also part of my job to talk about our planning journey on my channels, so I’m a lot more involved than Nick. That said, we’re finding ways to get Nick more involved in the decision-making process, especially in areas like invites, budgeting and logistics. Make a list and divide it up evenly.

Choose your celebrant or priest wisely
Don’t underestimate the power of your officiant. Whomever you choose should be prepared to personalise your ceremony to suit you. Their role is to get to know you both and create a program tailored to your specific values, beliefs and personalities. We’ve chosen a progressive celebrant whose beliefs are consistent with our own.

Don’t get married in a church that doesn’t reflect your religious beliefs, even if it’s to please your parents. If you do decide to marry in a church, talk to the priest about choosing readings that are in accordance with your views. I can’t think of anything worse than antiquated sexist rituals like only having the female partner say the words, “to love, honour and obey…”

Keep your name
I have nothing against taking your partner’s surname. What I find problematic is blindly believing the female must take the male’s surname because of tradition. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t considered taking Nick’s surname. It would make things easier down the line and I absolutely love how Vanessa Lovett looks and sounds. That said, my surname is such a big part of my identity and heritage. I don’t have any brothers, so I feel even more compelled to carry it on. Before deciding you must take your partner’s name (if you’re entering into a heteronormative marriage, that is…) consider the alternatives. I’ve met couples where the male has taken the female’s name and I really wish that happened more frequently.

Do away with gender norms
Don’t feel like you have to conform to gender normative bridal party roles. I love attending weddings where the couple has opted for bridesmen and groomsmaids. You’re also not obligated to have to have a bridal party either. In some circumstances, it makes more sense to go without.

It’s also no surprise that brides are choosing new ways of walking down the aisle. Some walk alone, others walk with both parents or if you’re Kate Winslet, you can have Leo DiCaprio give you away.

Write your own vows
As a writer, I’m incredibly excited to write my own wedding vows. Since we got engaged almost a year ago, I’ve been thinking about my vows often and know I couldn’t handle reciting stock-standard vows that have been said a thousand times prior. Not only are vows the most significant part of a wedding, they act as a reminder as to why you’re getting married in the first place! Your guests are here to celebrate your love and your highs and lows as a couple. Of course, you can always supplement your words with beautiful poems and readings.

Even if you don’t think you have the writing skills to eloquently put your feelings into words, there are plenty of online and offline sources to inspire you. My friend, Lucy at Christchurch Weddings created a book, Notes From the Heart for this very reason. Full of prompts, jotting down ideas has never been easier.

Marry a feminist
Being respected is nice, but sadly it’s not an inherent trait in all partners. You deserve someone who can understand why you’re angry when women are harassed, patronised or denied opportunities. When we read tweets about women being abused because they decided to wear shorts that day, it’s a relief not having to explain why this is infuriating. Who has time to debate why misogyny is bad with their partner?

Getting married doesn’t make you a bad feminist. I’ve had moments of guilt during the planning process. I love hosting celebrations of all sorts and planning a wedding has been so much fun (okay and a bit stressful). Let’s give ourselves permission to enjoy these moments. Love’s worth celebrating, right?

There are a hundred other ways to incorporate modern ideals into your big day, but these are some of the ones that are important to us. I’d love to hear your thoughts on feminism and marriage.

Photos by Malia Rose.

November 4, 2018
The Instagrammer’s Guide To London

No matter how many times I go to London, I find there’s always something new to discover. On my last trip, I stayed with some New Zealand friends and the time before that, a high school friend who was attending London School of Economics. This trip was a blogging trip and the first time that I opted for a hotel.

If you’ve never been to London before, you’ll immediately notice just how expensive everything is. Of course, you can find affordable options if you’re looking, but it’s not the place to go if you’re after a cheap getaway. That said, taking the underground is the best way to get around, it’s super efficient, convenient and surprisingly affordable. I spent just over 50 pounds on my Oyster Card for the week and that includes one trip to the airport via Gatwick Express. Oh, and all the galleries and museums are free, so you can save your money for accommodation and eating out.

I spent the week with my friend and fellow foodie, Isabelle and we prioritised visiting cafés and restaurants and creating content for the gram (and the blog). Although I’ve shared London recommendations in the past, this is the most current list for anyone visiting London within the next few years.

Art and Culture:

Somerset House is an arts centre in the heart of London. It offers a diverse public programme of contemporary arts and culture.

Tate is an institution that houses, in a network of four art museums, the United Kingdom’s national collection of British art, and international modern and contemporary art. If you haven’t been, be sure to add Tate Britain and Tate Modern to your sightseeing itinerary.

There’s so much to see, do and experience at Kew Gardens that it’s worth planning ahead. We dedicated our afternoon to exploring Palm House, Temperate House and The Hive, which is a temporary installation, but could have easily spent an entire day here.

Palm House: An iconic Victorian glasshouse, the rainforest climate inside supports a unique collection of tropical plants from some of the most threatened environments on Earth.

Temperate House: The largest Victorian glasshouse in the world is home to an internationally important collection of temperate zone plants, including some of the rarest and most threatened.

The Hive: A unique, multi-sensory experience designed to highlight the extraordinary life of bees. A feat of British engineering, it stands 17 metres tall, set in a wildflower meadow.

Cafés:

Ozone Coffee Roasters is hands-down my favourite place for a flat white. It’s owned by two New Plymouth sisters, so you know the coffee will be superb. You might recall I visited the New Zealand outpost when I was in Taranaki last year, so I made a point of visiting the UK branch. I suggest coming here for breakfast, especially if you’re craving a traditional Kiwi feed with poached eggs, sautéed spinach, halloumi, roasted tomatoes and hashbrowns!

AllPress is another New Zealand café and roastery. It’s actually my preferred espresso roast in New Zealand. We visited the Shoreditch location on Redchurch Street (my favourite street for eating and shopping in London!) and loved both the space and the coffee. Grab a seat on the bench and spend a few minutes (or hours) people watching.

Peggy Porschen Cakes is one of the most Instagrammed spots in London and it isn’t difficult to see why. The cupcake shop boasts a light pink exterior that’s decorated every season. We visited just before Halloween and loved the pastel pumpkins and ghosts.

We ventured to Élan Café on our second to last day in London. Initially, we anticipated a beautiful café without a substantial (or quality) food offering, but we were wrong! Not only were the Middle Eastern dishes inventive, they were filling, delicious and beautifully presented.

Restaurants

Duck and Waffle is a must-visit whenever you’re in London, but especially for the first-timer. Located on the 40th floor of the Heron Tower, the views are seriously incredible. Isabelle and I had a window seat with stunning views of the skyline (we were ridiculously close to the Gherkin and the Tower Bridge). Order the duck and waffle because it’s the namesake dish and mouthwateringly delicious!

Located on a trendy street of hotels, bars, and shops in Hackney, Genesis is a brand-new entirely plant-based (and all-pink) eatery. Not only is the interior super ‘grammable, the food is remarkable! I even returned the next day for a kale caesar and kombucha (because, balance!) Whether you’re vegan or not, I 100% recommend this spot! It was my top pick during our week in London.

There are so many great pizza joints in London, but Pizza East was our all-time favourite. Yes, the pizza’s good but OH MY GOODNESS, the macaroni and cheese is life-changing. It’s the ultimate comfort food for when the temperatures drop.

Isabelle recommended a gorgeous wee French bistro whilst we were in Soho. Not only is Le Café Bohème beautifully understated, there was live music when we visited and guests spilling onto the streets. I was reminded of my time in Paris as we indulged in shoestring fries and some greens (for balance, ya know?) The drink menu also looked excellent, so I’ll have to return for a negroni or two.

Located on the first floor of the Town Hall Hotel, the light-filled Corner Room is a place where neighbourhood folk and visitors can hang out any time of the day. The menu showcases bold flavours and seasonal dishes with a French flair.

Other favourites include Saint Aymes for beautiful freshly baked goods, Bubblewrapwaffle (Hello Kitty waffles, anyone?) and Biscuiteers for the most adorable iced biscuits I’ve ever seen. They certainly make beautiful souvenirs! Mister Fitz is an Australian ice cream shop (I actually visited when I was in Brisbane) with a seasonal pop-up in London’s Soho neighbourhood.

Shopping

Conservatory Archives is the most millennial of plant shops. Located in Hackney, this space is filled with plants of every variety. With the aim of bringing “more plants in our lives”, you’ll find a gorgeous assortment of plants hanging from every shelf and will undoubtedly be tempted to take something home with you.

I was in the market for a new medium-sized suitcase and was thrilled to discover one of AWAY‘s few brick and mortar shop in Soho. I opted for the pink case and I am officially obsessed.

Goodhood is Shoreditch’s lifestyle destination and a favourite local spot for a global and well-curated selection of both men’s and women’s clothing as well as homeware.

I fell for AIDA, an independent concept store in Shoreditch. Combining Scandinavian inspired men’s and women’s clothing, homeware and delicious, barista-made coffee, it’s no wonder this is a must-visit for locals and visitors.

Labour and Wait offers a wide range of timeless, functional products for daily life.

Stay

We were lucky to stay at two different hotels during our time in London. The first was Ace Hotel in Shoreditch, which we both agreed was in the perfect location. East London is my favourite part of the city, it’s artsy, creative, fashionable and gritty. Here, we were spoiled for choice in terms of where to eat, drink, shop and even workout! If you’re hoping to stay active, I can’t recommend 1Rebel enough!

A bit more off the beaten track, but still central was Artist Residence. One of four properties, this boutique hotel has an international reputation for its luxurious rooms and suites. We were invited to stay in the Grand Suite and it was divine.

Photos by both Isabelle Cheng and myself.

October 28, 2018
Authenticity, Oversharing and the New Age of Instagram

Instagram’s evolved considerably since I first downloaded the app back in 2010. At first, I only used it to edit (add filters) to my photos before sharing them on Facebook. Eventually, I began using it to share the occasional holiday snap or sunset before it became my main platform in 2013 whilst living in Toronto. Working for a bridal magazine, I became friends with a blogger and fellow editor who was an active Instagram user and soon began documenting our seemingly glamorous lives. In reality, we were barely scraping by in an industry that desperately needed to be disrupted.

In the beginning, Instagram was used mostly by creatives, photographers and editors, or at least those were the accounts I followed. I craved an inside look into their covetable careers and social lives. Even though most content was shot on an iPhone, it was beautifully styled and curated. I still love following accounts who offer a simple and aesthetic glimpse into every day life.

Instagram today involves over sharing and a scramble towards showcasing your most ‘authentic’ self, whatever that means. In some communities, it means showing your face without makeup and having a rant about whatever’s on your mind that day. In other settings, authenticity means showing the behind-the-scenes of a photoshoot. That said, I do appreciate the democratization of the industry because it means anyone with a smartphone and an opinion now has a platform and a way to share their experience.

I’ve observed the way Instagram and social media are used in both North America and Australasia by both individuals and businesses. While I understand this desire to be transparent, in this age of information overload, I still admire a bit of restraint and consideration. Parents are missing important moments with their kids and couples are having less sex because they bring their phones to bed. (Though that’s another conversation entirely…)

Personally, I have experimented with sharing more and giving more of myself to my platforms. It makes for a successful formula and allows you to connect with a larger audience. But there’s only so much of yourself to give. What happens when you’re unable to put your phone down on the weekend because it’s part of your job? I’ve had multiple conversations with fellow bloggers who feel guilty for not immediately responding to their DMs. I was chatting to a friend at NZFW who was previously an avid vlogger. He’s since stopped because he said he was never present for his actual friends and family, constantly hunched over his phone. He was no longer able to save anything for himself. That truly resonated with me and it’s something I think of often…

There are pitfalls to this new age of Instagram, many of which have been well documented. I’m still trying to strike a balance between showing up for my audience while still reserving space for myself and my loved ones. On one hand, I applaud bloggers who discuss everything from miscarriages to depression on their channels; knowing they might help even one person feel less alone. To be able to connect with people around the world, especially those who feel insignificant or ignored, is a truly incredible endeavour.

Where do you stand as a blogger or content creator? Are there limits to what you’ll share or are you an open book?

Photography by Nancy Zhou.

October 12, 2018
How To Win In Berlin

I always knew I’d eventually visit Berlin, it was only a matter of time. When my friend Alice moved here from Christchurch, I knew it was the perfect opportunity to see the city through a local lens. She’s now lived in the German capital for six months and has an incredible grasp on everything worth experiencing. I spent a week with her, taking in the city’s extensive and often troubling history, cycling from neighbourhood to neighbourhood, drinking the best coffee and eating the best falafel (there’s plenty of it!)

If it’s your first time in Berlin, I’d highly suggest kicking things off with a walking tour. These are typically free, although you’ll need to tip the guide at the end. I opted for the Sandeman Walking Tour, which was approximately 2.5 hours long and took us to most of the major historical landmarks. Our guide, Sam Noble was incredibly knowledgable, delving into WWI and WWII history and explaining everything thoroughly. Beginning at the Brandenburg Gate (which you absolutely must visit anyway), you’ll see the Berlin Wall, Checkpoint Charlie, Berlin Opera House, Berlin Cathedral and several more sights. It’s an excellent starting point if you’re unsure where to dedicate your energy. If it’s your first time in Germany, they also offer concentration camp tours, which are a confronting yet essential part of any visit.

Once you’ve had your introductory tour, you’ll be all set to visit a few more sights. East Side Gallery is the largest open air gallery in the world (featuring 105 pieces of street art) and another way to take in the Berlin Wall. Take in some of the most famous pieces, like the Socialist Fraternal Kiss by Dmitri Wrubel and work by Thierry Noir, who was the original street art to grace the Wall. There are plenty of up and coming artists who get their start here as well. Despite being a popular tourist spot, you won’t encounter swarms of tourists and the stroll along the wall is quite pleasant.

Now that we’ve covered the absolute sightseeing essentials, I thought I’d break up my Berlin favourites into neighbourhoods since Berlin can feel a bit overwhelming otherwise. Alice took me all over town, from Kreuzberg to Friedrichshain, so let’s dive in.

Kreuzberg:
The creative, gritty and alternative area of Berlin, Kreuzberg is the centre of the city’s large Turkish-German community. The neighbourhood has gentrified over the past few years and is now a hub for creative types. When I asked friends where to go in Berlin, the majority led me to cafés, vintage shops and bars in Kreuzberg.

Hallesches Haus is a general store, lunchroom and event space with some of the best food I had in Berlin. It’s worth stopping here for coffee and breakfast.

Brammibal’s Donuts is a gorgeous vegan donut and coffee shop on the river. Not only are the donuts delicious, they’re vegan. Try a matcha with oat milk while you’re there. If you can time your visit with the Turkish markets, even better. There are two other locations in Berlin.

Voo Store: A concept store and meeting place for creative people. The carefully curated selection of womenswear and menswear is beautifully displayed. The in-house café, Companion Coffee is lovely, so bring your laptop (or a book) and stay awhile.

Turkish Markets: Kreuzberg is home to a big Turkish community. Every Tuesday and Friday the area comes to life as vendors set up shop along the canal for the city’s largest Turkish market, which stretches between Kreuzberg and Neukölln. Here you’ll find interesting street food, fruit and veggie stalls and tables stacked with fabrics. Cash is a must, and a sneaky haggle might work if you play your cards rights.

Görlitzer Park: Along with being a popular green space for Berliners, this park is notorious for selling canabis.

Mitte:
Mitte is the most central and diverse district in Berlin. It has stunning architecture and museums. You’ll be spoiled for choice on how to spend your time and money in this area.

Berliner Dom/Berlin Cathedral: Although it was heavily bombed during World War Two, this imposing cathedral has been beautifully restored to the architectural marvel it has always been, from the distinctive exterior to the exacting detail of the ceiling. Guided tours as well as audio guides are available and tell visitors fascinating anecdotes and facts as well as illuminating the many historical aspects of the cathedral.

Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe: This striking space is composed of concrete blocks right in the centre of the city. Also known as the Holocaust Memorial, it resembles a cemetery and a visit here is sobering.

The Barn: One of the most well-known local cafés, brewing coffee in every third-wave variety.

Five Elephant: Another outstanding coffee shop, plus they have soft-serve (!) in a lovely, sparsely decorated space.

Father Carpenter Coffee Brewers: Tucked away on a laneway just off the main drag, Father Carpenter is a must for excellent breakfast and coffee in the cosiest environment. It’s a great stop off if you’re hitting up a few of Mitte’s shops.

Prenzlauer Berg:
Bonanza Coffee: One of the earlier specialty coffee shops in Berlin, Bonanza is beautiful and stark. The minimalist café is known for its quality pours and delicious baked goods by Albatross. It was my favourite coffee and pastry of the week.

Mauerpark: Come on Sunday for the thrift market and karaoke. Mauerpark is a must-visit during the warmer months.

Curry 36: I found it mildly amusing how the various currywurst shops scattered throughout Berlin were numbered. I’m told Curry 36 serves up the best in the city, though I’m no curry connoisseur.

Friedrichshain
Home to much more than the famous club, Berghain, Friedrichshain is an interesting and eclectic neighbourhood. If you’re that way inclined, RAW, is Berlin’s most well-known row of nightclubs. Even if you’re not, it’s worth visiting during the day as it’s also home to a series of cultural events. There’s also a slew of cool secondhand shops, restaurants, parks and cafés. I didn’t spend too much time here, but here are some of the spots we hit up.

Not only is Shakespeare & Sons an excellent bookshop, it’s also home to the best bagels in Berlin. Fine Bagels also have challah, rugelach and schmears. Delish!

If you’re after secondhand goods, Boxhagener Platz has one of the best Sunday markets in Berlin. The grassy square also has a Saturday food market, a playground and play pool for the kids. Platz is also home to a great burger spot, authentic Asian restaurants, ice cream and coffee shops.

Michelberger Hotel: My sister, Stephanie spent a month in Berlin last summer and recommended Michelberger as a place to stay, but also as a café and coworking space. One thing I love about Berlin is how prevalent coworking spaces are and just how many freelancers and creatives appear to be flocking to these hubs.

Well, there you have my list of short and snappy Berlin must dos. It’s a big city, full of neighbourhoods, so be sure to explore it for yourself and find your own favourite spots.

October 8, 2018
Beauty Treatments Worth Investing In Before Your Wedding

We’re getting married early next year, so I’ve recently started thinking about our timeline leading up to the big day. In addition to all the other preparation involved in planning a wedding, it can be overwhelming to think about beauty commandments and skincare options. Navigating all the available options can be confusing, to say the least! Do I need monthly facials? What about teeth whitening and hair colouring? Should I get lash extensions or a lash lift? I’ve even heard about brides-to-be opting for more extreme measures before their wedding day.

Well, I’ve done the research for you and narrowed down the five treatments that I think are worth investing in before your wedding day.

1. Hair colour trial run
I’ve recently started experimenting with my hair colour after not having dyed it for five years. Whether you’re opting for a drastic hair colour change or just trying to find the perfect shade, colourists suggest getting it done three months out so you can see how it wears and ensure it’s exactly what you want for your day. If you’re happy, book in your final colour two weeks before your wedding date.

2. Henna brows: I’m a regular at The Pamper Bar in Ferrymead and have talked about my love affair with henna brows a lot on Instagram. If you’re unfamiliar with henna, it’s a natural tint that doesn’t use peroxide or ammonia to process. It soaks into the hair follicle more evenly than standard tints (ideal for grey and blonde hairs, but I find it perfect for my dark brown brows, too!) Depending on your skin type, henna lasts about 4 weeks on the hair, which is double the wear of a standard tint. The Pamper Bar team can also create a skin stain with henna that lasts up to one week — perfect for those who like a more defined brow or want to forfeit brow cosmetics day-to-day. They’ve got a range of colours that they customise to suit your needs. I love how henna accentuates my natural shape and fills in those gaps, so I don’t have to bother with brow makeup.

Photo by Ana Galloway

3. Lash tint and lift: I’m currently debating between a lash lift and tint (which I’ve had before and LOVED) and lash extensions for my wedding day. Lash lifts typically take 45 minutes to an hour, depending on whether you’re having your brows done as well. Lash lifts last about 6-8 weeks, depending on growth cycles, ideal for those who are heading away on a honeymoon right after the wedding.

I’ve previously shied away from extensions because I used to wear false eyelashes for dance and the extremity of extensions freaks me out a bit. That said, The Pamper Bar offers a range of thicknesses and lengths to customize different lash looks. For brides, the team recommends a trial for extensions to ensure both parties are on the same page. It’s even better if the trial can coincide with your makeup trial.

4. Teeth whitening
Having pearly whites for my wedding day is definitely priority for me. I’m generally pretty happy with my teeth, but also pretty addicted to coffee, so know I’ll need to buy some whitening strips a month or so before our wedding. I initially considered professional whitening, but I want to make sure my teeth don’t look unnaturally white. The salon brightening strips at The Pamper Bar are a happy medium, so I’ll be trialling those later next year.

5. Facials and LED Therapy
Many brides-to-be opt for facials (be it microdermabrasion or chemical peels) during the months leading up to their weddings. I recently tried an Ultraceuticals Vitapeel facial, which is a medical-grade chemical peel that helped address my acne, hyperpigmentation, fine lines, wrinkles and sun spots. The results were INCREDIBLE and a natural way to make skin look younger.

In addition to more intensive facials, LED therapy is a relaxing way to treat any skin concern. From acne to rosacea to ageing, the non-invasive treatment uses specific colour light to treat the concern. Each colour light emits a different wavelength in to the skin, which triggers your skin’s response to help heal your skin concern. For example, blue light kills acne-causing bacteria while red light balances skin tones, increases fibroblasts and collagen. Each treatment starts with a cleanse and exfoliation followed by 20 minutes under affectionately named Larry the LED light. The Pamper Bar team then finishes with an eye cream, serum, toner and moisturiser. For extra relaxation, your hands and arms are massaged and the total treatment takes 30 minutes.

“If you’re wanting your skin to be extra plump and glowy, we recommend three treatments per week for two weeks before the big day,” says The Pamper Bar owner, Deneale Knox.

“With skin concerns like acne, we suggest getting started a few months out and have a course of three treatments for a month before beginning a maintenance plan once we establish how your skin is responding.”

While there are seemingly endless treatments you can invest in before your wedding day, try not to get too carried away. For me, my skin is where I’ve chosen to splurge because clear, glowing skin makes me feel most confident. My advice is to figure out what’s most important to you and focus on feeling your absolute best. The months leading up to your wedding day can be stressful AF (believe me, I know…) so spending a bit of time having a facial or treating yourself to a pedicure is a great way to unwind. It’s going to be one of the most important days of your life, so have fun and it’ll show!

This post was sponsored by The Pamper Bar, but all opinions expressed are my own.

October 5, 2018
Let’s Go To Glasgow

Are you ready for another city guide? Let’s explore Glasgow, Scotland’s biggest and most boisterous city.

Historically a working class city, Glasgow’s population grew rapidly during the 19th century. As a result, there’s a mix of 19th century Victorian architecture, early 20th century ‘Glasgow Style’ Mackintosh-designed buildings in addition to modern edifices. This impressive combination makes the city a magnet for architecture aficionados.

While Edinburgh is quite touristy, I found Glasgow to be far less so. And Glaswegians are some of the friendliest, most hospitable people I’ve ever met. Travelling alone, I’d often spend my time getting caught up in conversations with shop and café owners throughout the day. Speaking of which, here are my top picks for restaurants, cafés, shops and sights in Glasgow:

Stay:
I checked into CitizenM, which is a modern chain of boutique hotels throughout Europe, North America and Asia. The Glasgow branch is centrally located and has all the amenities you could ever require. The 24-hour canteen is the perfect spot to get some work done alongside a handcrafted cocktail and a sandwich. The rooms are small, but the beds are big (and ridiculously comfy). I was impressed by the personal greeting on my TV, the stuffed toy (how cute!) and bath products.

Sightseeing:
As I mentioned above, Glasgow is home to some incredible architecture. I didn’t have the time to take it all in, but I loved what I saw. My favourite spot for design and architecture was The Lighthouse. The first public commission of Charles Rennie Mackintosh, The Lighthouse dates back to 1895. It’s now Scotland’s Centre for Design and Architecture, but has a history as the former home of The Glasgow Herald. The spiralling staircase has some of the best views of Glasgow.

Another gallery worth visiting is GoMA, the modern art museum located in the city’s Royal Exchange Square. The extensive gallery displays work by local and international artists, most of which addresses contemporary social issues.

The People’s Palace is set in the historic Glasgow Green (be sure to check out the gorgeous Winter Gardens). Home to a collection of objects, photographs, prints and film, the palace gives insight into how Glaswegians lived in years gone by.

Another highlight for me was walking to the top of Queen’s Park (unfortunately, it was pouring rain during my entire stay) for the best view of the city!

Eat:
Oh, where to begin with Glasgow’s restaurant and café scene… I had a long list of places I wanted to try and also received some recommendations, so there was a lot to cover in two days.

Potluck: Just trust me and order the seasonal hotcakes at this tiny café in Glasgow’s Southside. Piled high with different toppings (I had the plum, yum!) this dish is almost too pretty to eat. But definitely eat it, it’s the most scrumptious meal I ate in Glasgow and the coffee was also my favourite in Scotland (big call I know!)

Market Coffee: Surely you’ve seen Market, in all its pastel pink glory, gracing your Instagram feed? If not, let me fill you in. Opened by Glaswegian blogger, Kate Spiers (Kate La Vie) and her husband Jordan Spiers, Market can be found in the city’s Southside. Designed by Kate herself, the interior is carefully considered (and super ‘grammable, obviously). Not only that, the coffee’s excellent and there are plenty of delicious cakes and cookies on offer. Kate and Jordan were away when I visited, but I had some great chats with her brother, Matt. It’s the friendliest (and prettiest) place for a rose petal latte.

Café Strange Brew: This bustling café is home to some of the best coffee and breakfast in the city. I ordered the Turkish baked eggs and a cortado and they didn’t disappoint. I recommend grabbing a window seat for some serious people watching.

Ox and Finch: My top pick for dinner and drinks is Ox and Finch. The meat-focused restaurant serves inventive dishes alongside beautiful cocktails. That said, the vegetarian dishes are equally delicious. Need I say more?

Topolabamba: Quality Mexican fare in Scotland? You’d better believe it. Topolabamba has a range of delicious (and spicy) Mexican dishes and the best margaritas in town. I opted for the fish tacos (pictured below) and they were super tasty.

Shop:
Glasgow has plenty of high street shops and well-known UK retailers. That said, I personally prefer hitting up one-off boutiques and unique spaces that offer something a little bit different. My nails also needed some TLC while I was in Glasgow, so I booked an appointed at NAF Salon. The space itself is gorgeous, all pink and neon and my nails are still looking amazing two weeks later.

For a carefully curated selection of prints, books and non-tacky souvenirs, head to Stephen O’Neil Art in the Southside. I basically wanted to take everything home with me.

Another local shop that I popped into was Pampas, a charming independent boutique selling several covetable items. Located in the West End, the shop carries labels like Pinko and J Brand.

Have you ever been to Glasgow? Let me know what you got up to!

September 29, 2018
Skye High: Exploring the Highlands with Haggis

The Scottish Highlands have been high on my bucket list for as long as I can remember. When the opportunity to visit the Isle of Skye arose, I couldn’t believe my luck. Following a few days in Edinburgh (see my city guide here) I was set to embark on a three-day excursion with Haggis Tours.

To be completely honest, I’m not usually a tour kinda gal. When I travel, I’m armed with a laundry list of sights, shops and restaurants I want to visit. That said, the best (and only) way I was going to make it to the Highlands was on a tour. And you know what? I’m so glad I decided to book in with Haggis. The experience was enriching in every way imaginable. It was informative and entertaining, and I left with a handful of new friends from all corners of the globe.

We began our adventure in Edinburgh, on the Royal Mile before setting off for the Highlands. Our first stop was the Wallace Monument in Stirling (if you’ve seen Braveheart, you’ll know all about Sir. William Wallace and his contribution to Scotland). We then carried on towards Glencoe and even encountered a family of highland cows (or hairy coos). The ever changing landscape was suitably moody throughout the three day excursion and the Highlands were more gorgeous than I could’ve ever imagined. After Glencoe, we stopped by the Eileen Donan Castle, which has featured in several movies like James Bond 007: Skyfall.

The second day of our tour was the highlight for me. After leaving our accommodation in Kyle of Lochalsh, we explored the Isle of Skye beginning with a two hour hike up to the Old Man of Storr. Windy, rainy and muddy, the views were remarkable! After the climb, we had lunch in Portree, a quaint seaside village. Personally, I loved all the brightly coloured (pink!) houses. Later on, we ventured to our second accommodation at the southern end of the Loch Ness in Fort Augustus. As you probably know, the large loch is famous for hiding the infamous sea monster, Nessie. Unfortunately we didn’t spot her during our stay, but we did encounter some amazing local pubs, gorgeous cathedrals and castles.

The final day was spent travelling back to Edinburgh, stopping in quaint villages along the way and for a whisky tasting at Tomatin Distillery. We also spent some time at the Culloden Battlefield where the 1745 Jacobite rising came to a tragic end. The harrowing mass war grave is an incredibly powerful and sombre experience. We then ventured on towards Inverness and Dunkeld, where we stopped for our final lunch. I had the best coffee and sandwich of the trip!

Our guide, Gillian was hilarious and full of energy. She spent the three days cracking jokes (often of the ginger persuasion) and telling us legends about every monument or sight we saw. I’ve never had such an entertaining tour guide in all my travels.

Not only is Haggis the most affordable tour available, they cater to individuals travelling alone. Our group of thirty or so was incredibly diverse and we all got along so well. Skye High takes you to all the Highland highlights. In fact, we packed in so many sights and activities, that I left feeling as though I’d embarked on a five or six day tour.

Photography by Cooper Morrison-Smith

This post is in partnership with Haggis Tours, but all words and opinions are my own.

September 23, 2018